clarifications!

first n foremost, i wld like to set one thing straight.

whatever that has happened between me n her, is just a one sided love on my side. if some of u thinks she is juz a bitch, playing ard with me, thn i say u r god-damn wrong. in no way she is that kind of person. all along after e 1st rejection, its juz a one sided affair on my side.

wat i said previously was juz an off e head comments:

sometimes i feel that i m nothing to u. u only come to me when u need me n chucks me aside when i m not needed. helo, i m still a human being after all. i have my own emotions n feelings. yes. i may appear strong on e outside, but in actual fact, i m as weak n fragile as u are.

wat i meant here was, i felt lonely when i aint talking to her. i feel lonely when i dont see her. eveything that i said, is a refection on myself. it is in no way related to her.

ok i duno where i m heading with this post, i hope u ppl understand that e previous post has nothing against her chracter n wat she is. n i hope u ppl understand that, my feelings for her is still there n i will continue to be by her side.

thats all i have to say.

i realised

i think its time i wake up frm this unrealistic wait. frm this moment onwards, i will forget u. i will take u off my heart. u dun deserve a place in it. i wld rather give it to someone else who will appreciate it. n yes, u r no longer e piority in my life. u to me is juz another ordinary friend whom i can choose to ignore.

wat u have done has really disappointed me.

headache

i do not know wat is e point of this entry, but i feel i need to let my feelings b known. at least for thos who still bothers to read this.

sometimes i feel that i m nothing to u. u only come to me when u need me n chucks me aside when i m not needed. helo, i m still a human being after all. i have my own emotions n feelings. yes. i may appear strong on e outside, but in actual fact, i m as weak n fragile as u are.

if u even bother to notice last night, i wasnt enjoying myself ay all. all my thoughts was on u. i hate to guess. n i know my 6th sense well enough to trust it 100%. n when i have this weird feelings coming into my head, all i can do is to wait. just to wait for u to call me to calm my nerves down. no doubt, i m worried. i m worried about u. cos u mean alot to me. i do not wan to see u get played yet again.

i really coludnt take wat i see last night. i almost blew up. but i kept my calm. cos i trust u to know wat u r doin. u r old enough to decide on yr own. but sometimes, e way u act, gives me no choice but to worry.

i really do not know wat to do. should i continue waiting or should i just give it all up. it gets frustrating when sometimes e wait seems so fruitless. but e sight of u makes me wana go on n on.

sigh. i feel like shit now. head has been spinning since i got home. i haven slept properly. all thats in my mind is u. all i long for is for u to notice that i m beside u. i m no toy. throw aside when u r tired of playing.

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